The name of this particular grain of sand on the beach we call the internet is The Least Read Blog. DId you not get the hint? By coming here you are jeopardizing my whole business plan. At first it was thought that in business one needed to create a service or product and then charge for it. Then along came Google and it became one of the largest companies in the world by giving its product away for free, much to the chagrin of its competitors.
I plan on taking this concept to the next level. I plan on giving away absolutely nothing, for free. I have already picked out the yacht and private jet from this month's Robb Report.
So stop reading this blog. You are ruining everything.
Dorron Margalit
Founder, CEO and Sr. Copywriter - The Least Read Blog
Monday, December 28, 2009
Wednesday, June 4, 2008
Saturday, May 31, 2008
Monday, May 5, 2008
Continued success.
Nice, people all over the world are continuing to not read this blog in droves. In fact, just yesterday the entire population of the world chose not to read my blog.
I even have proof.
Tuesday, March 4, 2008
Elephant Apartment
So, I really wanted this post to be a cartoon. But I can't draw, so I'm just going to explain it to you. Also, this way, if you don't get it then you have nothing but your limited visual and conceptual imagination to blame.
Here it is.
The scene:
An apartment where we see a family of elephants (mother, father and child).
There are onomatopoeic "Booms" and "Thuds" coming from the ceiling above causing one of the larger elephants to look up and exclaim...
The copy:
"God-dammit, it's like they're a bunch of dinosaurs living up there, with all their stomping around all the time!"
Please remember to continue not reading this blog. Over 6 Billion people can't be wrong.
Here it is.
The scene:
An apartment where we see a family of elephants (mother, father and child).
There are onomatopoeic "Booms" and "Thuds" coming from the ceiling above causing one of the larger elephants to look up and exclaim...
The copy:
"God-dammit, it's like they're a bunch of dinosaurs living up there, with all their stomping around all the time!"
Please remember to continue not reading this blog. Over 6 Billion people can't be wrong.
Friday, February 29, 2008
Why write a blog that no one will read?
Well, it didn't stop any of the other 67 bajillion schmucks out there with an internet connection from writing theirs.
The difference is, everyone writes their blogs in the hope that someone will read it. But no one has, does, or ever will. Which is why I am writing this blog with the express purpose of no one ever reading it.
I feel successful already.
And if you are reading this, please stop. You are singlehandedly contributing to the failure of this, my stated medium of creative expression (oh, I have others, but I'm not going to tell you about them). And please don't tell anyone else.
This is akin to techno-trash as art. Like those avant-garde modern artists who assemble waste and trash into museum installations, to which patrons stare at and say "is this art? It must be, it's in a museum. Let's go to the gift shop and buy something you can only buy at museum gift shops." Well, this is the digital internet version of that trash. it's just trash, plain an simple. And the internet is the new museum. You wander around, see stuff you like, see stuff you don't like, show other people stuff you like to make them maybe like you more, and look at stuff people send you that they like so that they like you more, which makes you feel good, because the stuff they like is crap. They have no taste. And then you go to the gift shop (.com) 'cos there's a sale, and you buy stuff you don't really need, but it's free shipping and no taxes and then one day your wife sees you wearing an LED flashlight strapped to your head. But it was only $6 shipped honey.
And so on. And so on.
An now you can see why no one would read this blog.
Maybe the next entry will be more interesting. I hope not. But there might be a picture of something that you have never seen before. Or just a link to a great deal.
Ugh. Bye.
The difference is, everyone writes their blogs in the hope that someone will read it. But no one has, does, or ever will. Which is why I am writing this blog with the express purpose of no one ever reading it.
I feel successful already.
And if you are reading this, please stop. You are singlehandedly contributing to the failure of this, my stated medium of creative expression (oh, I have others, but I'm not going to tell you about them). And please don't tell anyone else.
This is akin to techno-trash as art. Like those avant-garde modern artists who assemble waste and trash into museum installations, to which patrons stare at and say "is this art? It must be, it's in a museum. Let's go to the gift shop and buy something you can only buy at museum gift shops." Well, this is the digital internet version of that trash. it's just trash, plain an simple. And the internet is the new museum. You wander around, see stuff you like, see stuff you don't like, show other people stuff you like to make them maybe like you more, and look at stuff people send you that they like so that they like you more, which makes you feel good, because the stuff they like is crap. They have no taste. And then you go to the gift shop (.com) 'cos there's a sale, and you buy stuff you don't really need, but it's free shipping and no taxes and then one day your wife sees you wearing an LED flashlight strapped to your head. But it was only $6 shipped honey.
And so on. And so on.
An now you can see why no one would read this blog.
Maybe the next entry will be more interesting. I hope not. But there might be a picture of something that you have never seen before. Or just a link to a great deal.
Ugh. Bye.
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